Thursday 2 December 2021

new barn

 I took this picture yesterday evening of Ducky chilling under his new heating pad with a couple of new horsey friends around him. Its starting to feel like home there now.





Tuesday 30 November 2021

November update - back to office and a new barn

 After 20.5 months I am sitting in my office in our company building on my first official day in. Its weird to say the very least. Getting here was hard, just the organization of lunch, dogs, clothes for the new barn after work, clothes for the day in the office too, shoes..... so much to consider that hadnt been on my radar for almost 2 years. 

At the almost 11th hour I remembered that the dogs needed someone to let them out at midday, thankfully new driver Chloe stepped up to it, that was a relief. I wonder if she will do this every week.

After this week I am expected to be in this office two days a week. I have picked the two days that I dont see Ducky at the new barn in the morning. All this with still daily cases, daily deaths and a new variant called Omicrom that all the scientists are trying to understand the threat from. Obviously the deniers and anti-vaxxers already know all that needs to be known but I block their views out. My slight back away from social media helped by more time at new barn and therefore less time on the internet, helps me here.


New barn is 10 mins away from home and Ducky and I have been there since Nov 13. Its been a change that although is fabulous, has been hard. I knew it would be hard for him, all his world changed but its been hard for me too, at the same time as being wonderful. Its been exhausting to be in these two places at once on this.




He's slowly getting used to it, and so am I. Now it just needs to stop raining, like now. We are all over it.

I have booked a vacation for next year. So far flights are booked and paid, with insurance fully investigated for covid cancellations and interruptions. Accommodation at BB has also been booked but needs to be adjusted for a different time period, House sitter has been booked. 

I am afraid to get excited as I am almost convinced it wont even happen. At this point in Covid-life I am like everyone else beaten down by the constant of it, by the feeling that it will never leave us. I cant get round to finalizing accommodation because of this. I am not planning even take-outs to eat in the lanai in BB or some two day beach accommodation in Old Town KW. I am hoping that soon I feel differently but I am not holding my breath.





Thursday 30 September 2021

August and September

 August and September were awesome months. 

I continued to appreciate my home. We went out a few times for dinner in a restaurant and had a two week staycation where we went to Taylor Head beach which is pure beauty, the Rope Loft in Chester, ate at Lucketts winery more than once and hit up Melmerby Beach. We also finally went to Burntcoat to see the ocean floor



We are continuing to live with our versions of long Covid. For me I cant smell and my taste is muted and messed up and I sometimes am just plain exhausted when others with me are just fine. Hubby suffers complete continuous exhaustion. 

I get so crazy angry when I read anti vax commentary online. At one point in time I would have tried to get them to understand what Covid can be like, unfortunately I am wasting both time and energy so I dont bother. I feel like social media has given a mouthpiece to stupidity, misinformation, ignorance and hate.

Ducky and I have been working with a new coach and hes come on so well we went to our first show together ever. It was wonderful.






Since then we have started to dabble in very low level eventing. I love cross country, dressage and jumping so why not. The vet has cleared these plans so we move forward with caution.

 



We started to renovate our kitchen, its almost done, we are just waiting on countertops to be installed so that the back splash can be done too.
That renovation led to a paint colour change in our bathroom too - paint with the name Florida Keys Blue couldnt be ignored!



We all got our covid shots in June and July and are welcoming the world slowly opening back up. Still have no clue when we can next travel but I remain hopeful. I get excited every time I hear a plane.

We also traded in the Mitsubishi for Mr Harrison Ford and now wait for the trailer to be available, I bought a Sundowner as I love them and its a little delayed due to an axle shortage. Shortages everywhere it seems.


Ducky and I also went to a little obstacles clinic back in June on a sweltering hot weekend. I just love hanging with him, hes a very special horse.







Monday 12 July 2021

July update

 Update as at July 12th.

It took a few weeks to get my energy levels back and I am not 100% sure they are the same as they were but I now feel good about doing everything again. I can ride, walk the dogs, climb stairs etc without getting breathless and have lots of energy which is handy as we renovate our main floor - kitchen and living room. 




I still have muted taste, I can taste sweet but not all the flavours in something. I know I am eating something savoury because I recognize it by sight but the taste is even more muted. I still cant smell the barn or dog poop (even when I am cleaning it up), my favourite bar of soap from Lush which I know has a crazy strong smell, garlic cooking or cat litter but yesterday I could suddenly smell the wood saw as it cut up hardwood flooring and the sunscreen I use. I cant smell the paint going on the walls though. It doesnt really make any sense as to what I can and can't smell.


Ducky had some slipping stifles which was a weakness from my lack of riding in the main covid time period so we are working on that with poles and transitions. We also plan to go to a couple of events this year - a Horse at Work cross rails class on August 14th is planned and a small show with a Hunter Hack class on Sept 11 but first we have a weekend obstacles event coming up in 5 days which I am uber excited about at Restless Pines with Nikki Porter. 



To be able to attend these events I have the opportunity to borrow a trailer which I am towing with the F150 that we were finally able to buy. The truck is amazing and I just plain love it!

  



The weather has been perfect, a typical NS July full of early morning and evening dog walking, deck meals, pool gazing and filter sounds, hot and humid days and nights which this year is actually hard for me and lots of evening riding.







Friday 28 May 2021

Our Covid May

 Its been an interesting May. 

May 9th - Paul is told one of his colleagues tests positive for covid, he books a test.

May 10th - Paul and I attend tests, his is PCR, mine is rapid and I have a negative result text to me on the way home.

May 11th - 1.15pm Paul gets the call that hes tested positive! I dont respond to the news in a format entirely suitable to the work zoom I was on.

We start isolating from each other at home, its tiring and I have a whole new appreciation for those working in kitchens in restaurants and fast food establishments in masks.

May 12th - May 14th hes exhausted and sleeping a lot and loses sense of smell and taste. As we are sleeping apart I check in on him each morning with more than a little trepidation.

May 12th - the girls and I test - negative. Have a nice little new road trip to test centre that includes Tims drivethrough drinks on way home.

May 14th - the girls and I test again - negative

May 18th - the girls and I test again, another brutal PCR test for me. Get home, walk dogs, feel tired, sat downstairs feeling really cold, had bath to warm up and then to bed where I commence chills and sweats all night. Next day am so tired take day off with headache to boot. Girls get negative results.

May 19th - feel rough still but start work as a little better and get the call that I tested positive. I kind of knew it was coming. Temp at 37.9, I wonder what it was last night when I didnt think to check it. Thank God Paul feels better. Girls have new isolation end date and continue wearing masks in the house. I am either in my room or outside now. The weather is beautiful and I am so very thankful for our deck.

May 20th -fevers have gone replaced by tight chest and a prickly sensation in my lungs thats more than a little alarming. My oxygen reader says 96,97,98 so thats ok. I make sure in a low key way that my friend has my plans for Ducky that I sent on an email. The only way I could go to sleep was with the knowledge that while all my relationships may not be as I want them to be, I have nothing unsaid and nothing to apologize for.  Thats strange to have that as the comfort that enables you to actually go to sleep. I know that if I wake in the night and am winded just going to the bathroom that I have to call 911. Its so strange to be here. My joints hurt too, I cant even walk downstairs forward as my knees hurt.

May 21st - so tired, cant imagine being able to have the energy to even lunge Ducky again let alone ride again. Sat outside where I observe my oxygen at 93 and idly ponder that if it goes down to 92 I have to call EHS and thats a journey that I will be taking alone. I focus on slow deep breathing.

May 22 - still fighting the headache and tight chest but its not so bad. I now have diarrhea and feel very low.  I am so annoyed at reading all the non believers BS on line. All the government control crazy shit thats out there. Everyone is shouting at the wrong subject, the government are not trying to control us in some conspiracy way FFS. The virus is what they are trying to stop. Lose my sense of taste and smell. 

May 23-May 26 am slowly getting back to me. I cant taste or smell yet but I am back at work. 

May 27. So much better, public health should release me today but they dont call.

May 28 - still waiting for public health to officially release me from isolation. I wanted to see Ducky yesterday but no call. I so wanted to go as it was his vaccine day.


So far I feel a mix of thoughts. So glad I was able to stay home. So thankful for the level of care from public health. So cross that we got this in the first place. So afraid at times. Now so frustrated to still be waiting to be able to leave the house (and a little bit fearful that I have fallen between the cracks in the system). Half heartedly looking forward to my first vaccine dose which is now on Jun 4 (half hearted because I loathe needles and not excited about another hit to my immune system), so thankful the NS Government is vaccinating teenagers - my two have their shots booked for Jun 11.

Maybe, we will have a normal life again soon.

In the meantime a friend in this neighbourhood lost her father to this insidious virus and another friend lost her 7 year old in an accident. So much sadness and tragedy.





Friday 30 April 2021

April update

 Its been a few months, I shall summarize below:

Ducky:

Was diagnosed with kissing spine in March after I noticed he had a really sore back. After this soul destroying (at the time) news we jumped into action. He wasnt ridden really since January and we had been working together on the ground. He's now receiving spine injections, acupuncture and massage and strengthening through pessoa work and a carefully laid out ridden agenda. I moved to a new coach who specializes in both the pessoa and hunters. 


Discovered I could still have hunter dreams despite this news as long as we follow the vets advice and started to have a lighter heart and fresh hope.


First day back on after his saddle fit:





Covid:

It had been quiet here in the Maritimes re: covid but lately with the introduction of the variants we are now back in lockdown. The girls are on day 2 of homeschool and the barn and life is back to mega restrictions.

I am a bit more scared than I probably was before, if thats possible. I feel like this is warfare against something we cant see and I want to be a survivor along with everyone I know.

Vacations:

Because of Covid I am back to only being able to watch Fishmonster each day and just wishing I could book a trip to Florida. Who knows how long it will be just a dream.

Work:

Is good.

Me personally:

I started a weight-loss journey with Noom on December 24th as I was so tired of being at 198lbs. I had been used to 195lbs after being used to 192lbs and I was so over it. With Ducks back issues I finally decided to do something about it. Today I am 173.6lbs and still going. I have a whole new outlook on food and for that I am thankful.



Tuesday 19 January 2021

January 2021 so far

 January so far...

Has been unseasonably warm. Apart from a couple of days we have gotten away with warmer temps. I think yesterday marked the change but so far I am grateful for the first half. I hope that this doesnt mean that winter is just late and will last until June.

I am trying to consider how I look at food and what food I like to eat and what that food actually is. I spend a lot of time trying to make willpower last but we all know that its only around for a while so instead of battling I am attempting to reset my mind, please wish me luck.

Currently I am yearning for a trip down South. Its not happening of course with Covid still around in all its awfulness. The other morning I woke up feeling low about it. About the fact that it may never go away, that the vaccine wont obliterate it like I hoped, that it may always be in our lives, that 2019 may be BC (before Covid). That is a terrible thought.

Ducky and I have been focused on flat work which has been nice especially in the not so freezing cold temps and I have been working on my personal goals as a human. 


I have been walking the dogs each morning and at the weekend continue to take them somewhere new.




I am trying to really just focus on enjoying my home and the cozy-ness of it all.





Finally - rest in peace Karen, taken far too soon .